“There is no period of time longer than waiting for a reply.”
I read this post once from a friend’s Facebook status and I thought of how it’s a riveting way of reiterating the line Doc G said from Albert Camus. Waiting is hell.
It’s true that one of the hardest thing to do is to wait, especially if what you’re waiting for is a response. Human beings as David Foster Wallace said operate on their own default-setting. Once they are in need of information, acknowledgement, things, etc., they want to get hold of it as soon as possible because they need it. It is a very centralized kind of thinking because it seeks the subject’s satisfaction. It is “I” who needs an answer. It is “I” whom you should respond to. It is very totalitarian and it gives us an idea on how this world operates.
Yes, we’re very busy people and we can’t afford to wait. We always have a lot of things going on and tasks to accomplish everyday, and our minds always function in a certain way. I have to pass this paper to Sir Earl today. I have to pay the person I owe soon. I have to finish my part for our group work. But have we ever thought of it this way: Sir Earl needs this paper today. The person I owe needs the money I borrowed soon. My groupmates are relying on me to do this for the team. Why not consider the Other during our everyday struggles? Why not look at things through the Other’s eye?
This precisely describes that occasion when you don’t immediately reply to a text message because you’re busy doing something; and at the end of the day, you suddenly remember it and that’s when you reply. Think about how the person who sent that message needs an answer. S/he, as another “I”, needs to be affirmed by you -- the Other. That’s why a response is a responsibility. The Other is on the line.
We’re always so stuck up with the work piled in front of us, we forget that it’s not us who’s waiting, but rather we are the ones being waited. Tayo ang hinihintay. The Other is waiting for us and if we don’t acknowledge this, they might slip away. The world is waiting for us to do something to sustain it. Our parents are waiting for us to tell them how our day was. Even random people wait for us --- the guy lined up behind you to order coffee, the car at your back waiting for you to park, or your groupmate in a defense panel waiting for you to save his/her ass because s/he can’t answer the panelists’ question.
We should respond to these people. We should consider that these many Others are also “I’s” who need the same things as we do. They also need an answer because for them, waiting is hell too.
We have all experienced waiting. As the saying goes, "Waiting is the hardest part." No one likes to wait. Experiencing waiting for someone or something however, gives us time to think about things, maybe even about waiting too. We realize how much time we wasted waiting. That 5 minutes you spent waiting for the car in front of you to finally pass could have been spent paying for overdue books you borrowed from the lib. In my case, I learned how I was making other people suffer because they are waiting for me. I realized I should always answer to the other immediately and do my best to spare them from hell--that is, waiting.
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