Emmanuel Levinas made the distinction between the “Law of the I” and the “Law of the Other”. He stated that the pattern of the Western thought, which follows the “Law of the I”, is that the I goes to the Other but only to go back to one’s self. On the contrary, the pattern of the “Law of the Other” is that the I goes to Other and remains there. From this we can imply that the “Law of the I” goes to the Other with the intention of a gain for one’s self. It reduces the “alterity” of the Other in a way that the Other is reduced to what the functionality is for the I. Hence, its relationship is more egoistic. On the other hand, the relationship of the “Law of the Other” is altruistic and selfless, meaning, it is not based on any gain or benefits, rather, it is based on caring or being responsible for the Other which respects its uniqueness.
Upon hearing, I could not help but relate it with the aspect of choosing or making friends. When I entered High School, I was frequently advised by my parents to choose decent friends which would be a good influence to me throughout my life. I was reminded often, especially during my first year in high school, to stay away from drug addicts, cigarette smokers, students who cut classes just to hang around somewhere and the like. This reminder somehow instilled in me a thought that friends should be chosen, not made.
Furthermore, it turns out that when I entered High School, “cliques” are very common. Cliques refer to a group of people having a common interest or other features and they do not readily allow other people without such same interest or feature to join them. Hence, I encountered various “cliques”, from group of preppies, to nerds, to rock stars, to athletes and so on and forth. Furthermore, I also encountered some people who hang out with “friends” to make them stand out. And this proved to me that friends are really chosen, not made.
Although these are the type of relationships that Levinas is opposing to. One must not go out to the Other because of one’s selfish interest. One must not reduce the Other to what one wants it to be. We should not choose our friends. Instead, we should make friends. One must respect the Alterity of the Other- its uniqueness and mystery that makes life more exciting. True and good friends must respect the Alterity of each other anyway so friends must not force each other to conform and to be uniform. Rather, friends must allow each other to grow and develop “to be”.
I think that when you are still in high school, you should choose your friends because your friends in high school will help you to become the person that you are destined to be. Choose the person/s that you are comfortable to be with because while you are still young, you are very vulnerable to any kind of influence around you, may it be good or bad. On the other hand, if you are already in college, I think that this is the time for you to make friends and not choose them because by now you have already built your foundation, you already know who you are so it is time for you to explore the world, meet someone that doesn't have the same interest as you and try to work things out. Life is too short to be contented at things that you have, go out of your comfort zone and experience the world with others.
ReplyDeleteI guess the saying "tell me who your friends are and I'll tell you who you are" summarizes our painful habit of associating a person with others. We should not tie down a person or worse, a group of persons to their observable characteristics or behavior. We know that in a group of friends, differences still surface and thus, as Christian said, this is where friends allow each other to grow. There can be positive growth in friendship and we should not categorize persons according to their circles. -Nicole Nuguid, Ph 102 F
ReplyDeleteI couldn't agree with you more. My parents always remind me to choose my friends wisely and while this is true to a certain point, i believe that choosing your friends based on your lifestyle or the benefits that come along with that friendship is just sad. While it's important to surround yourself with people who push you to become a better person, i believe that it's all a matter of perspective. Some of my closest friends do things that i don't necessarily approve of but that doesn't make them any less of a true friend than my other friends. Opening myself up to different kinds of people has allowed me to learn things about myself and the world from different perspectives.
ReplyDelete-Genica Lim (C)
I think that it is important to choose your friends wisely. Friends are the people whom you will take advice from. But you do not choose friends according to your lifestyle, but you choose them according to what values you see in them. This is not totalization because you have to acknowledge them as different from you, and you have to accept them. However, there are a limited number of friends you can have, so you might as well pick the ones you jive with. You have relationships with those that you dont, not necessarily as friends but as acquaintances or classmates, etc. That does not mean that you stop getting to know them. Whatever happens, they should not be taken into context as your classmates or what, but as infinite beings/Face (as Sharon or as John or as whatever their name is). Very closely related to this is the difference between the socious and the neighbor.
ReplyDeleteKate Bonamy
Ph102 A
I get that the law of the "other" encourages us to go to the other and remain there but we must also be wary of the other. There are people who are just bad influences and if you think you can change them and make a difference then go and do it. However, you mustn't be tempted to do the same thing as they do if you know that it's bad. Some people are more prone to get influenced by bad things so they must return to the law of the "I" in order to get a perspective of what's happened. If we must change, then change because it's the right thing for you.
ReplyDeleteJan Weslee Lim
PH 102 C