Monday, September 23, 2013

A Time When Imperfection Trumps Perfection

by Kate Bonamy

I've been having a bad week. I spent the first three days of my week studying for our statistics long test, and God knows how much I dislike that subject. I have a hard time understanding the different distributions, etc. Finally, test day came. I was a little bit confident, because the teacher said that the test would be easy. Indeed, it was. However, it was so frustrating that I made a careless crucial mistake at the beginning of the last number, which makes my solution the entire number completely wrong and worthless. For a moment, I thought that my time and efforts were wasted. I let go of that right away, because I have another LT coming up. That night, I visited my dentist. I was expecting her to inject anesthesia on me, because I knew it would be painful. She didn't. I hate pain- everyone does. Thursday came. I was late for my appointment with my tutee. I went to my car and found myself trapped in my parking space. I just learned how to drive recently, so I'm still kinda bad at it. Then I accidentally hit the car next to me. The guard came to get my name, etc. When I got to my tutee's house, I thought we would finish up soon, because I still had to study my exam and quiz the next day. Instead, I got home 8pm, tired, hungry, and depressed- totally not in the mood to study. Still, I studied a little. Friday came and I did not know what was going on with me. I felt like my mouth had a different brain from the rest of my body, as I had offended two of my three teachers that day. And those two offenses led my classmates to possibly hate or dislike me (more, if they already do). I apologized to my teachers, but I was already disheartened. It was so hard to study that day because of everything crappy that has been going on. i felt like it is never ending, and it just keeps coming. This is to the extent that I thought, "Is the bad luck even possible to happen in real life, or this is but a dream?"


Then I remembered what we had learned in Philosophy. It is emotions -joy, sadness, pain, etc. that make us confirm our existence. It confirms that this is not a dream, and this is my life. It is a bad week, but I would just have to be more optimistic about it. Then I thought that it wasn't all that bad for a number of reasons. Through everything, I had friends who never left my side. They continually try to understand and forgive me for my shortcomings. It may not be the most materialistically rewarding week. But I learned a lot. Also, I am glad that I existed. Just like our example in class, a hundred in your hand is better than a thousand in your mind. I can stay forever dreaming of a stress-free, perfect, and imaginary life, which I know will never come to happen, or I can live with what I already have and try to make the most out of it. Basically, a dream life does not exist. It is but a common dream- utopia. However, come to think of it, the life that is already in your hands is greater than the life in your head because that life actually exists. Moreover, that is the life that shaped you to be who you are. It may be inevitable to sometimes dream, and there is nothing wrong with that. However, more often, we have to live in the present and be contented with what we have. I guess what I really learned this reflection is that an imperfect but existent life is better than a perfect but imaginary one.

12 comments:

  1. When I have bad days, I just try to remember Marcel's exclamatory awareness: "Here I am. What luck!". Smile. (Eve Avila, Philo 101A)

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  2. This is a good reminder on how we should try to be optimistic with the things in life even when it is really, really difficult. Sad, bad, frustrating, hurtful times are also (sadly relevant in our lives.) Fine, maybe sadly for the moment but for the better for the long run. But like what was mentioned, those things help in our existence -- to actually feel it and know it. It is also through those bad days or difficult times that help us become better persons. To live a better life not only for ourselves but for others as well.

    - Finina Muñoz (C)

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  3. Negativities will always be a part of our life and this is why we must focus on the positive and keep on living and affirm our existence. Good luck!
    Diane Cheng (C)

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  4. Sometimes, it's hard to be optimistic in the environment most of us are in, when we're constantly pressed with pressure from studies, organizations, families and friends. But to be pessimistic just adds to the problem, so we might as well try to think positively. You're definitely right about how we learn new things when we face challenging situations. As Churchill said, “A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.” A bad week doesn't mean a bad month or a bad year! Hang in there!

    - Laura Hein (A)

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  5. I really liked this part of your article! "a hundred in your hand is better than a thousand in your mind." It really shows that not everything is perfect and there'll always be our off moments. It's better just to live life normally with these good moments and bad ones, instead of living one that's perfect. Don't worry about this week, everyone has their moments of ups and downs, but we just have to hang in there! We always can't get everything the way we want it, but we just have to keep our heads up. Never be brought down by this negativity, eventually you'll be rewarded someday with an awesome week full of blessings!

    - Luis Tanjuatco (A)

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  6. I can really relate to your post, especially since we're down to the last few weeks of school. I've been experiencing loads of work these past few weeks and the more I think about it, the more it makes me panic. The overwhelming feelings of stress really pushes me to my limits. More often than not, I always see giving up as the best option. However, you said it best, it is better to live an imperfect but existent life rather than waste it away dreaming in my sleep. We really just have to look at life with a more positive outlook and with hope for better days ahead. :)

    Kathleen Sun (A)

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  7. "However, come to think of it, the life that is already in your hands is greater than the life in your head because that life actually exists. Moreover, that is the life that shaped you to be who you are."

    I feel like this is something I should remember. I can't change the bad things that have happened to me or the mistakes I've made, but still the life I'm leading is better than the life I want because it's real. It's what I have, and it's part of what makes me who I am. When I think about it that way, it's easier to make peace with my mistakes.

    - Veronica Jereza (C)

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  8. I really like your line, " imperfect but existent life is better than a perfect but imaginary one." I hold this to be true. I know we all have our bad days, but also remember that we definitely have good ones as well. Life is truly a journey where we encounter bad and good experiences. We become who we are through our lived experiences. This is why real life in a sense would always be better than a dream. Since it is through these experiences that we truly reflect on and transform by. It's always about perspective. One way I comfort myself on bad days, is by reminding myself that I'm not alone in this world. Other people as well go through these ups and downs, just keep on living.

    Fern Tensuan (C)

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  9. Life is a inevitable journey that leads us to many bumps along the way, but these bumps or rather these experiences we have is what makes more in tuned with others. Similarly, what is life without the imperfectness of it. You know the saying "It is during our darkest moments that we must focus to see the light." Because, how can we know what is light without knowing darkness first?
    You've had a bad day, but somehow you've seen the light, and I think that's what really counts.
    Trixia Tan (C)

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  10. Life can be inevitably sad but look at this way. Which do you prefer to live your life, experiencing misfortunes or not experiencing anything at all? Even if they're bad and sad for us, it is still an experience and we can learn from them.

    Mar Tan (C)

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  11. "And that's the thing about pain, it demands to be felt." - John Green
    Wow! As a fellow Atenean experiencing hell week right now, I'm sure it seemed like nothing was going right for you at the time. I love how you aren't one of those people who just turn a blind eye when something bad happens and act all happy. You were able to acknowledge that you were indeed having a really bad week which is a lot better than being in denial. Society has this tendency to Disney-fy everything. Don't get me wrong, I love Disney and how it still manages to put a little bit of magic in our lives. However, life isn't about the happily ever after. It's about living in the moment and acknowledging that life isn't perfect, but that's okay. Pain is inevitable and we should feel it, don't run away from it! But after you've grieved, you have to redirect your thoughts like DFW and continue to strive for transcendence.

    Genica Lim (C)

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  12. The fact that you realize that makes you really a strong person. The fact that you were able to lay down all your thoughts-- despite having a very bad day, shows how capable you are. It shows courage.

    And that I think is the strongest quality of humanity. We are resilient. We are warriors. We are survivors. We are capable. And we are strong.

    Denise Tan (A)

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