by Laura Hein
We cannot sustain true happiness. As my theology teacher quoted from a famous person, “a person was in crisis, is in crisis or is going to be in crisis.” Problems will constantly arise within our families, from academics, or organization work and they will undoubtedly ruin the good day we were having. But the good news is true happiness is possible. But just in a brief moment.
Personally, we are truly happy when all our needs and wants are fulfilled. By the sound of it, this may seem to lean towards the idea of materialism, but I hope you try to eliminate that particular view as you read this. Here, I refer to our need of our grandmothers to get well soon, or the parents’ want for their children to graduate with honors to secure a good job and a good life. These needs and wants at discussion encompass all kinds of needs and wants of a person. Wants are just as important as needs. There may be a married woman out there with the most wonderful husband and children. She has a simple life with all the necessities to survive. Yet, the mom can’t afford her children the thirty-thousand pesos cell phone that the children always tell her about their friends holding at school. She knows that it is not her need to buy for them but she wants to spoil her kids sometimes too.
At a time in our lives, we will have one need or want that is the most important among all other needs and wants. When this need or want is fulfilled, we are truly happy. During the week the ACET results were announced to be released, the whole time I was inching for the verdict. I’m sure at that time, our biggest need was to get into the Ateneo. Possibly, at the same time we might have wanted to buy a new bag or clothes for the start of college life. We might have needed to finish off the last year of high school with a high QPI. Or we might have wanted to have our high school friends to attend the same universities with us. There were obviously other worries but the main focus was on passing the ACET. When I found that I had passed, there was a moment of elation that was so great and overwhelming that all others needs and wants vanished. I was no longer worried about the amount of difficult academic work approaching, meeting new and very different people or just basically entering a big community.
In my opinion, at moments like this, we are truly happy. We, humans, are as already described many times by us, greedy and selfish. It is impossible for us to have each and every of our needs and wants. It is impossible. The only way we can be truly happy is to forget about these needs and wants for a moment. Once we let them collapse, we find true happiness.
I agree with the constant flow of problems that will surely arrive in your life. In a funny way... I feel that there is no life without problems. I feel that having problems or experiencing failure is what keeps us moving forward. Not to say that we should seek them out... in fact, we don't need to because they are bound to show up one way or the other... unceasingly throughout your life. I've always been a firm believer that one of the best frameworks that one could follow in life is one that is similar to that of a boxer. You work hard to become better so that you will become the best but once you're there someone else will come and beat the heck out of you which will prompt you to work your ass off again so that you become stronger.. Now repeat that process a thousand times til you reach the day where you can no longer work to be better. When that day comes... hopefully... you'll be too old and incapable of starting the process again which simply means you are ready to retire.. Life is a constant building and breaking then building again. With problems and failures serving as your catalyst that will push you to keep getting better and better. Problems, wants, and needs... these are the reasons why we get up every single morning.
ReplyDeleteLeo Lorenzo (A)
I agree with the fact that we cannot reach true happiness. As cliche as it sounds, happiness really is a journey. When you're waiting for something to arrive (material objects, sembreak, summer, etc.), you think that once it's here, you'll be the happiest person in the world. And you will be, but only for a brief moment because once you get that want, you think "now what?" and sometimes you realize that you're probably not as happy as you were when you were waiting for that want. Because while you were waiting, there was a constant excitement and impatience but finally getting that want, it's like yay and then that's it. Then you start looking for other things to want and wait for it and get it - it's a cycle. And all throughout, you feel moments of happiness and sometimes, even moments of sadness when you don't end up getting that want. But later on, when you look back at those moments of waiting, you might end up realizing that in those moments of waiting, you were happy too. You just have to look at it at a different angle.
ReplyDeletePatricia Cosico (C)
I do agree with what Leo said that "Life is a constant building and breaking then building again" we may go through a lot of ups and downs, moments of sublime happiness or perhaps moments of deep sadness however, these are the moments that affirm our existence and truly make us say that "I'm happy to be alive". If we look at true happiness in the light of materialism, I do believe that we can never be truly happy as it is in human nature to always want more. Each day as we fulfill our goals and get all our "wants" will we be satisfied then? As one goal passes, it is constantly replaced by a next one. This is precisely how our world is indeed very broken. We are all too consumed with gaining and gaining as this world which is too concerned with results. I guess true happiness is attainable when we are closer to the persons we actually want to become amidst this brokeness of this world.
ReplyDeleteFrenchi Baluyot (A)
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ReplyDelete"But the good news is true happiness is possible. But just in a brief moment."
ReplyDeleteThis might be true if we based our happiness on an earthly-level. I don't think true happiness only stems for a brief moment. But what is true happiness? For me, happiness is to know the Savior. Knowing Him is not an earthly-level happiness, it is forever, which gives us this sense of a happiness that is never ending, that doesn't last for just a brief moment. Happiness is when you know God smiles at you, this is love. This smile is forever. It is written in the heart of God. I know that's a very religious statement, but hey, I'm a believer. The philosophy of this distinction between worldly happiness and happiness given by God is what makes sense to me. Sorry if I offended anyone by these statements, but despite all the failures, all the sins I've committed, all my shortcomings, my fears and problems, needs and wants, because I put my trust in Him, I'll always be truly happy.
Menardo Miguel Jimenez (A)
If there's one thing I learned in life, it's that there will always be things that are beyond our control but happiness is and will always be a choice. The problem is that most of us fall prey to the idea of happiness. We spend most of our lives setting goals and specific timelines for ourselves. When things don't work out the way we plan it to be in our heads, we get lost or try to justify with it by coming up with an alternative plan. DFW stresses the importance of choosing how and what to think. Always remember that your idea of the "worst day ever" can be what someone is prayer for every night. Someone once told me that "Now and then, it's good to pause in our pursuit of happiness, and just be happy."
ReplyDeletegenica lim (C)
I love how the Taoist/Zen way of looking into things and that is not-attachment. I think that idea goes hand in hand with your idea of letting go the need/want for a moment to let happiness unfold. Hope goes with this as well. I believe in faith. Hope forms expectations and that's detrimental to what ones aspires for. Non-attachment / letting go of the needs/wants will go a long way and adding faith (that everything will turn out into something great/bad) to the mindset will surely help one immensely.
ReplyDeleteRyan Racca (A)
For me, reaching the state of true happiness, is still possible. This is why I disagree on the note that, we, as humans, can't reach that state of happiness. I think it all boils down to our own choices, definitions, and meanings. It is how we use our own perception and insights-- and use them as our own. With that, I believe different people reach their different states of true happiness. As unique individuals, we are fashioned to find our own "states", our own "happiness", our own beauty of the world, our own journey. As they say, "to each his own". To each his own--- happiness, to each his own journey, to each his own state, to each his own choices. It's all dependent on us, and how we look through our own hearts and our own systems. With that I believe, it is when we look through our own unique "life kaleidoscopes", where we can find our own state of happiness.
ReplyDeleteDenise Tan (A)
You said that we can really be happy if all of our wants and needs, whether materialistic or not, can be fulfilled. Indeed it is, but impossible. Because when we fulfilled a certain want or need, we immediately replace another goal to fulfilled and this process will never stop. But I still agree to your point that we can be truly happy, but for a moment only. The moment that we've got what we want, reached our goal, the moment that we've found our existence, the moment that we've done something for others...these "happy moments" enrich our human experience and make us to be a better person. Life is all about wants and problems - satisfaction and unsatisfaction. Life without problems will be no life, since with no problems means that we don't need to work for something anymore, and this implies that we are perfect already, which is impossible since we are only finite beings. Yes, we can't really achieve that true happiness longer than that "moment", but the sum of all the moments that you are happy will surely be more than the constant happiness. The sum of all the problems and needs in our life is what brings meaning to it.
ReplyDeleteWai Yiu So (A)
I do agree with what you said that it is impossible for us to get all of the things that we want and need. I believe that this is one of our limitations and one of the things that make us human. To add to this, we have also discussed in class that we will always have that feeling of dissatisfaction that can only be solved through inner change or inner transformation. And maybe this could be the reason why it is impossible to have everything; because maybe these needs and wants are not truly the things that our hearts desire. However, I would have to disagree with you when you said that happiness is only experienced in brief moments. Like Genica, basing it also on experience, I already realized that happiness will always be a choice. It is something that you can find everywhere and something that you can always choose to live with every day.
ReplyDeleteHazel Alino (A)
This post reminded me of how Dr. Garcia mentioned how an “uninterpreted life is not worth living”. They say it’s the little things that truly matter. It’s the little things that shape you. However because we find ourselves drowned in the "wants" we ask ourselves, isn't it too late? In the yoga classes i've attended, they always remind us that it isn’t too late and that it never is. What's important is that we listen to ourselves, that voice deep within us that truly knows. We stop, we reflect and we when we’ve come into terms with who we’ve become, we move forward. How we move forward is the real question here and what we do from here on out is what truly matters. When we know, we know. We know deep down what truly matters. It just calls for us to lower our pride and be humble enough to admit these to ourselves and in doing so; we will find what makes us happy.
ReplyDeleteYzabelle Siy (A)
I agree that sometimes, there are this little things in life that just hinders ones happiness, but then it is not that we're looking for the ultimate happiness, it is also looking at the small details that we can have happiness and feel what real happiness is all about. It is not forgetting all different responsibilities or just being selfish, but being in the present, living life as it is and loving it.
ReplyDeleteTrixia Tan (C)
Yes, happiness does happen in a brief moment and I believe that it is this temporality that truly makes life worthwhile. This blog reminded me of a realization I had a few years back when i felt like nothing was happening to my life. Laura said that "the only way we can be truly happy is to forget about these needs and wants for a moment'". I do agree with this which is why we human have the choice. Every moment of sadness or pain in our lives is our opportunity to grab our happiness because it is during these times that we can make the choice to turn our lives around and make things better. This is our power as human beings and despite our finitude, we have that capability to choose.
ReplyDeleteKyla Relucio (A)
I think that happiness can be found even with the littlest of things. There little things are the things that we often overlook because of its normality and simplicity. For instance, spending time with our friends and family or perhaps even just the realization that "I am so lucky to be! as opposed to not to be!". Perhaps happiness is not so much as a mood of a particular moment as it is an attitude about life. After all, finding the positive things even in the most darkest moments in our lives makes life worth living.
ReplyDeleteJohn Luciano (A)
While I do agree that it is in letting go of our materialistic tendencies can help one truly be happy, I don't totally agree with not having any wants or needs as the key to happiness. For me, it is natural to have wants and needs, but it only becomes an obstacle to happiness when we allow these wants and needs to be the center or only true source of our happiness.
ReplyDeleteJevin Sarmiento (C)
I agree with this too! We are all living a materialistic life. I think the main reason for doing so is not just to satisfy ourselves, but others too. It is to fill this emptiness of wants. We are only able to fill this emptiness for just a short while, but when we fill it with other things, such as dreams, ambitions and rewards, this is what truly makes us happy. Living life and accomplishing goals that we want to achieve is what true happiness and will always be there inside us. This will last much longer than fulfilling materialistic needs. This will last a lifetime.
ReplyDeleteLuis Tanjuatco (A)
That's very true. In every moment of our life, we're very focused on achieving the pressing goals we've set at present. We tend to think that we can only be happy if we achieve this or get that. And it's very human to be like that. As humans, we have urgent concerns on passing this subject, getting an A on this paper, finishing this project, and so on. But at the end of the day, we must remember that life can't be reduced to our current pressing concerns. When we're too focused on one thing we may neglect to see the importance of other things that are just as important in our life, like catching up with family and friends in the midst of finishing academic requirements. Happiness can come from anywhere, if we just know how to look. This is where awareness comes in. You may be struggling now with something, but in the light of this, see how everything else has turned out well for you. Just like what Bob Ong once said, "Di man laging happy, dapat laging thankful." :)
ReplyDeleteJeanne Peralta (A)