On Thursday night on my way home, I was heading to the LRT station. Just like any other days, a beggar (actually, I don’t want to name him a beggar but forgive me, I have to for the sake of my blog post) was sitting at the side of the road begging. Normally, I would get some coins and drop them into a cup he is holding. However that night, all I had was a piece of bread. I grabbed it and bent a bit to hand him bread I had. It was that moment… I faced him. I looked at his eyes for the first time. I used to drop some coins and just passed by. I don’t know how to express the feeling I had, but when I faced him, he was no longer a beggar. Yes, he was begging but regardless of that, he was a human being just like me who needs food, security, friends, and love.
When I handed him bread, he gave me a smile which I would like to describe as “innocent”. It was a sort of smile that came out from the heart. And, I smiled too (Was it ‘innocent’? I am not sure). On my way home, I wondered what made him smile. What I gave him was just a piece of bread that would never fill his stomach. It would never solve the problems he has. It would never change his life. I thought it over and over again. Perhaps, it wasn’t the bread that made him smile, but my attention.
I have always thought that what beggars need is just money and food. Yes, they need them. But what do they desire? We never care to think about what they desire. Probably, it is attention, care, and love that they really desire. When people notice beggars, they pretend they did not see them and ignore them or just give them some coins unwillingly just because they are ‘beggars’. The beggar I met on the way to the LRT is there every day begging and many people pass that road but how many people actually attend to him? I bet less than 10. I remember the times when I just ignored him pretending that I didn’t see him or I am in a hurry whenever I didn’t feel like helping him. Just because they are beggars, they are abused as a human being. In a way, this is their life, the reality that they can’t avoid.
When I looked at him into his eyes, I felt like he is demanding – demanding me, my attention, and my help. I couldn’t help but to ponder upon what I could do for him. Ignoring him who demands you is actually ‘killing him’. We should respond to the commandment in the appearance of the face, “Thou shalt not kill”. I am responsible for him. You are responsible for him. We are responsible for him. This is what I realized on that night.
What makes beggars, the beggars? Is it them begging? No, ironically, it is the society or people that name them as ‘beggars’ and confine them within that context. In fact, they are no different from us. They need what we need, they desire what we desire, and they demand what we demand as human being. We have to face them and when we do, they are no longer a beggar. They are one of us.
Whenever I see a homeless person, a beggar, a street child and anything of the same category, it literally pains me. My thoughts go disarray. I contemplate on my life and how lucky I truly am. But most of all I end up asking the same question all over again, what did I do to deserve such a comfortable life? What did THEY do to be left living without a home and begging for alms? Sometimes I think of the possibility of having a world wherein it would be all fair. Riches and resources are properly distributed even to those who cannot afford it. I'd rather live a life like that rather than to have all the things I want but to neglect the needs of the Other. This literal and figurative begging reminds us of the concept of accountability. That we do not answer for ourselves alone but we have the responsibility to respond to the needs of the Other as well. I firmly believe that we all have to ensure the fact that every human being receive not just the basic needs but also to live and not just merely exist. We all have the potential to help someone else, and I think it's best to start with those who need it the most. Most of all, responding isn't just a short-term calling. It's a lifetime responsibility.
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